I try very hard to show as many people as possible what incredible blessings my sons are- how EASY we actually have it in our lives. I have enlightened some, annoyed a few and shared the wonder of Casey and Connor with countless people. There are days I realize that my efforts and the efforts of families like mine are just not doing enough fast enough to make people realize that being afraid of Down syndrome is foolish.
Today I read that a couple in Portland, Oregon, was awarded nearly 3 MILLION dollars in a wrongful BIRTH suit. Let's look at that again- WRONGFUL. BIRTH!
This couple decided to have genetic testing done during the pregnancy and the child was not found to have Down syndrome. It turns out she does, in fact, have Down syndrome. She has mosaic down syndrome. The difference between mosaic DS and trisomy 21, which C&C have, is that in mosaic DS not every cell is affected- only some have the extra 21st. In trisomy 21 ALL cells have the extra 21st chromosome.
Had the couple known ahead of time they would have aborted their child. Since they didn't know they feel like they are stuck with this little girl.
I am really angry that the case was not thrown out, that a jury sided with them and felt sorry enough for their "burden" that they awarded them ANY money at all. I am angry about the precedent set by this case. But mostly I am angry that this little girl seems unwanted, unappreciated and viewed as a burden rather than a blessing.
WHAT???
What is this world coming to when people do not recognize the value of a human life? I am disgusted. I am angry. I am outraged.
I'm so, so sad.
How dare these people call themselves parents. They aren't. They are greedy, pathetic jerks.
If raising your child is such a chore why not give her to a family that would LOVE to raise her? Why not just admit you are not loving enough or compassionate enough to look at your own flesh and blood and LOVE her regardless of the number of chromosomes she has.
A real mother looks at her child and sees perfection. A REAL mother doesn't need money to "deal" with the burden of knowing her child should have been killed prior to birth.
Apparently the parents have received death threats. Let me cry for them. Nope. I have ZERO sympathy. It's no more than they offered their daughter. They would have slaughtered her before birth had they known she didn't meet their definition of perfect.
90%+ of babies diagnosed before birth with Down syndrome are aborted. KILLED. MURDERED. SLAUGHTERED.
Why?
Because they aren't "perfect"??
What's perfect? I'm not perfect though I don't have any extra chromosomes. I am not even close to perfect. I am flawed. This post proves it. I have an angry heart today. But THOSE people- those disgusting excuses for parents need to realize they aren't perfect either. FAR FROM IT. They are flawed and yet there are many who love and support them regardless of their MANY shortcomings. It's unfortunate their daughter isn't lucky enough to be afforded the same unconditional love.
There are people in my life who think I should ignore things like this. That I should not be affected by stories such as these that PROVE that my kids are less valued in society. How can I ignore this? How am I supposed to know that there are so many who look at me with PITY thinking I am BURDENED by my sons? How can I ignore the fact that as a parent of children with DS I am FORCED to fight for them- to ensure that they are given a fair shake? HOW can I sleep soundly knowing that there are juries out there that feel so strongly that a child should have been killed before birth that they award her parents $3 million in compensation now that they are stuck with her? Things like this serve only to reinforce the view of the majority that children with disabilities are worth LESS than those that don't have any disability.
I've said this before but I feel that it bears repeating- how many rapists, serial killers, drunk drivers, dead beat parents, child abusers, molesters, robbers, or drug addicts have Down syndrome?? How many adults with DS are sitting on death row for killing? So, really, where's the perfection in that??
Casey and Connor may have extra chromosomes. They may not talk yet, we may FIGHT for every damn milestone they hit but they are the most amazing little men I have ever met. They smile at everyone they meet. They see an old man in a store that most people would look past and they SMILE. They reach out to touch him, to say HI, to see the man that so many forget to love. I have seen this behavior time and time again. They make people smile. All the adults and teens I have met with DS are the same way- they see the people the rest of the world would deem unworthy of a smile, a kind word and big hug. What's MORE PERFECT than unrestrained love? What's MORE perfect than a person who sees the beauty that most of us forget to notice.
Normally, I can let things like this just go but not today. I am so sick about this. Not just sick but absolutely FRIGGIN FURIOUS! MY KIDS ARE NOT WORTH LESS THAN SOMEONE WITHOUT DOWN SYNDROME!! THAT LITTLE GIRL DESERVES A LIFE FULL OF LOVE AND NURTURING!! Sometimes I really hate this world.
And as I write that- I turn around and look at my miracle men and I am reminded that my corner of the world is perfect. My little piece of paradise is far, far better because of who my sons are and I adore, love and am blessed by every last chromosome in those little bodies.
And to anyone who is too ignorant to see the joy and beauty of my life I feel SORRY for YOU. I PITY YOU. You don't need to pity ME. My life is better than you could ever imagine.
8 comments:
Those parents sicken me. You have every right to feel disgusted by them. Everyone should. It is THEY who do not deserve the blessing that has been bestowed up on them. The little girl should be getting the money for putting up with such horrid parents.
You are right. You are right on so many accounts. Your children ARE beautiful. All children with DS are beautiful. And by choosing to procreate the Levy's took the risk of all that having a baby entails.
I agree with you- the one I feel most heartbroken for is their daughter...
sing it sista. beautifully put, I could not have said it better, this makes me sick!
Amen! To everything! And my WORD are your kids adorable!! Even though news of Grant's diagnosis was initially painful to hear some 6 years ago, I know find myself looking at your twins with some jealousy! What would be better than one Grant - two of him! We feel that we have extra joy, extra happiness, extra everything with that extra chromosome, and you have it all x2. Beautiful boys!
Perfectly said. My most fervent prayer is that the little girl at the heart of such a horrid lawsuit never knows just how her parents viewed her. I'm proud of my fella, and yours, and all of the guys and dolls I know. Pity the fools....
Amen to that X 20000000000000000.
I'm extremely angry too and I'm really over the "friends" that do not have a child with Ds trying to tell me that I shouldn't judge this family. I judge them and find them sickening.
The story is sickening. I agree with your entire post wholeheartedly.
Regardless of what challenges this child has, it is a little piece of it's mother and father. The idea of killing a beautiful angel of god makes me weep. I agree with the previous comment. Hopefully the sweet baby girl never has to know that this went on.
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