Monday, May 14, 2012

Dream A Little Dream

Time gets away from me these days. When I think it's only been a week since I've last written I realize it's been several. I offer no excuses other than that life has been happening and very quickly!

Connor was hospitalized for 3 days after contracting a nasty stomach virus and becoming extremely dehydrated. That was our first time staying in a hospital and though it was not the best experience of my life it was great because the nurses and doctors at Akron Children's Hospital are far and away some of the most caring and fantastic people I have gotten to meet. They all went out of their way to care for my little man and for me as well. I was 33 weeks pregnant when he was there and they did all that they could to ensure I was well hydrated and comfortable. I am grateful for all that was done for my family!
Now Connor is well and has finally begun walking with his brother. These two boys are so fast and so busy that by 8 pm I am ready for bed right along with them! What a blessing it has been watching them gain the strength and confidence to being walking and to watch them explore the world. Everything is new and exciting and I am learning to look at things as they do- with a fresh eye and an open mind. It's a beautiful way to see the world!

Speech is progressing slowly but surely. While they only have a few real words they are responding more and more to the things Matthew and I say or ask of them. For example, they can both point out their noses, heads, belly buttons and mouths. Also they are mimicking animal sounds now. They can tell you a what a wolf says, that an alligator says chomp, chomp, chomp (with awesome hand motions!) and they do a mean monkey impression. We are working on the cow say "moo" but M is one of those sounds that they just don't get consistently. It'll come.

I am now 36 weeks pregnant with Reagan and I am at the point where I really want to be done being pregnant and actually meet my little girl. I find myself wondering very often who she is and what she will be like. It's an exciting thing, imagining your unborn child. I can't wait for her arrival and for her to meet Casey and Connor and for them to become big brothers. It will be nothing short of fantastic.  


This is what I really came to write about today. I have talked about the dreams I have for my children but never do I really think what dreams I have for myself- unless I am actually dreaming. Last night I had this really great dream where I was talking to a group of people about Casey and Connor and Down syndrome. I explained that they are the greatest joy in my life and that to be their mother is to be blessed beyond anything I could have ever imagined. I told stories of adults with DS who are doing amazing things in their lives and that with support and love all our children could be capable of living their lives to the absolute fullest. I talked of my faith and how C&C strengthened my belief in God. It was a great speech. In the dream, there was a sweet lady, older, who was crying and crying while I spoke. I asked her why she was crying. She told me that she had found out a few days prior that her grandchild was going to have Down syndrome and she had been so depressed and sad thinking about her. She was not originally planning to come to hear me speak (wherever that may have been) but was brought by a friend. She held my hands in her hands and with tears pouring down her cheeks she told me that I changed her life and her opinion of her granddaughter to be. She no longer feared her but she looked forward to becoming an advocate and telling people that her granddaughter is a blessing. So overcome was I by emotion I cried with her. I felt like I had really made a difference in her world and the world at large.

What an incredible feeling!

When I woke up I felt like all of that had actually happened. I wanted it to actually happen. My dream for me is to make as much difference in the world as I possibly can. Not just for Casey and Connor but for Reagan and for every single child in the world. I hate the stigma attached to the diagnosis. I want to help break the walls down, pull the curtains back and reveal the beauty of the life that can be achieved with faith, support and love. I am starting small on that dream through this blog and the boys' fan page on FaceBook and sharing them with the everyone I can but I dream of finding a way to make a bigger impact. I will continue searching. Some day I will wake up feeling like I am living my dream rather than just experiencing it while I am sleeping.  

Dreams pass into the reality of action. From the actions stems the dream again; and this interdependence produces the highest form of living. Anais Nin



Jean said...

Meghan, You and Mathew are such a blessing to have each other and then Casey, Connor and soon Reagan. What great advocates you are for your children.

Ms Carol said...

Meghan you write so very well. Your word pictures and feelings are beautiful! I love reading them and I just want to tell you that your dream is going to come true, or perhaps already has only you just don't know it! Consider (with all your free time!) writing an article for a family or women's magazine about your experiences with your little men and how your life has been so positively changed by them! You might just get some moms-to-be re-consider that abortion they were thinking of when they learned their babe had Ds. That would be one of the best things you could do! How fun to hear they are both walking, thus providing you with the exercise you so badly need at this stage of your pregnancy (written with tongue in cheek)! And how wonderful they are starting to talk as well. Their growth may be a bit shower than some, but growths they are, regardless! The fact that they can follow your verbal directions is a huge step. You both have just been such great parents and I know you will be to Reagan too! Can't wait to see her newborn pictures. That's one of my favorite times with babies. They smell so new and they are so 'in the moment'!

my family said...

oh Im so glad you all are home and he is better, I know they must be happy to be together again. I missed your last post somehow and just caught up....your words are beautiful

WOW those boys are sure growing up:)

Amanda said...

Just found your blog! Your boys are beautiful! I loved the twin sleeping in same position picture! To crazy! Good luck with baby # 3! I will continue to read! Oh I'm from Ohio too! Dayton area!

Donna said...

I love your blog, I've been wanting to create a blog about my grandson Kevin who is 9 and has DS. He lives with me. I've written a story about Kevin in a book called "Gifts II" the reason this is such a unique relationship is that I am a dwarf. Since the picture you see of Kevin and I are about 3 years ago. Kevin is now 4 feet tall and I am 3 feet tall. Kevin is my whole life and would not know what life would be without him. You've inspired me now to do a blog about him and me. Thanks you so much!

Donna said...
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